I'm facing a personal clash. My inner-Samoan and my natural-palagi are at odds.
Samoa Melinda enjoys that neighborhood kids like to come to her house and play with her kids. She's happy to open her house and hang out with whoever stops by whenever they feel like it. She appreciates that sometimes these friends like to clean her house, wash her dishes, and bring her food. She feels that sharing food, computer, bikes, clothes and toys with them is no imposition but just what friends do. She likes to learn Samoan, listen to Samoan tunes strummed on the ukulele, and likes "eva"--hanging out. This is the Melinda that got us here in the first place. The Melinda that was tired of high stress university life, ventured down to Hawaii, and was captivated by a skinny scraggly-haired surfer kid who eventually proposed marriage. She knew full well that by accepting his offer, her life would probably never be the "normal" life she'd lived so far. And that was just what she wanted.
On the other hand, Melinda is Palagi, White, Caucausian, American, and Yankee-born nonetheless. She is willing to help out if it doesn't cost or inconvenience her too much. Why should this capitalistic Melinda share her family's things that they worked hard to obtain and maintain? Samoans are not known to take good care of stuff. It stresses Melinda to give up any control of her domain. This Melinda has obligations to fill, needs personal time. Sometimes she will close the windows and lock the doors and not answer the phone, wishing she didn't HAVE to close, lock and not answer; she wishes people would just leave her alone for a day or two.
Samoa Melinda says, Samoans are naturally drawn to children and families, and every kid needs a playmate. It's just natural that the neighborhood kids would want to come play all the time with the palagi kids. Especially because the palagis have toys. And they're not all broken. They have markers, crayons, paper, books, and so many wonderful things to discover. So an invasion on our house is kinda just part of having a family down here. Plus, relationships are more important than things. And there's no denying that Samoan Melinda has benefitted from these relationships. She pities palagi elitist who won't embrace the rich Samoan culture surrounding them, including befriending local friends and neighbors.
Palagi Melinda replies, that may be true but no one should have to deal with this. These adorable little girls come to our house and STARE into our windows. Just staring. Or call our names. For a long time. Until we come out or yell at them to go away, like dogs. Wouldn't that drive anyone insane? The poor things won't respond to requests. Just threats and slaps. American Melinda won't slap them. And then our teenage friend comes by, just knocks and walks in, needs to use the computer for "research" and somehow is in the middle of watching our home movies and browsing our photos when I come to check on her. She just wanted to post our pix on her mySpace friend page. Cause we're friends. Duh. Why is she searching our personal computer stuff? Why does she think that's okay? And then an older friend calls needs something huge, very desperately, as usual, and calls my cell phone over a dozen times. I can't help her. Sidenote, talking on the cellphone requires standing outside for any reception, requires patience, and costs money. I end up shutting off the phone. All of this happens between 4 and 6pm. When I'm tutoring a needy student at my house, trying to get dinner made, keeping track of my own two cranky little kids, and getting belly kicked by an ever-growing third. And Ephraim's out of town. I don't know if all these things would happen anywhere else. In "normal" places, don't people know better? Don't they respect privacy? Isn't there a more distinct line between invasive and friendly? Why do I have to explain to these people that what they're doing is NOT OKAY WITH ME? And why don't they listen? Is this what I came to Samoa for?
So what do you think? How Samoan or Palagi are you?

Our little dears. They really are sweet kids, honestly.
(Feronia and Ruta, sisters. Feronia's recovering from lice. Yay.)