Twees It Out

I've got a dilemma. I can't exercise like i used to. There's a long list of reasons. Good reasons. Like high temperatures and humidity between the hours of 8 am-5 pm. And like packs of wild dogs that chase anything moving faster than a snail. Then there's always complaining children, dirty dishes, dinner to be made, etc.

So I've made some new friends that help me workout right in my own room. Billy and Shellie Blanks. I'm told they're father and daughter, although they really don't resemble each other very much. What do you think? I like to do TaeBo because I like the kicking, punching, sit ups, etc. I've gotten past the embarrassment of working out in front of a screen. (Although I do draw my curtains. No audience, please.) Ella likes to put on her swimsuit and running shoes to exercise with me. She does pretty well, except when we do floor exercises and she climbs on my back. I hate that.

One rant (of many) about Billy, he starts you out on a crazy hard move, says "One more set" and then leaves you stranded when stands up and starts preaching: "Get your blood 'circalated' now" and "Hold those abs tight girls, be smart, be strong! I do 1000 of these a day, c'mon! Now double!" meanwhile you're about to die on the floor kicking your leg above your head for the 89th time. I hate that, too.

I grew up with Jane Fonda. My sisters reading this will remember following Jane with her poofy hair and electric blue bodysuit (with a belt) as she grapevined and cha-cha changed around the room. We used canned corn and ketchup bottles as weights, and brought out our tattered towels for the floor exercises. "Low impact, just follow Jeannie." "Reach, pull, reach, pull, reach, pull, and pull." I tried doing this workout video when I was at mom's house last year. It was too much. Too ...yikes, what's the word? Schmarmy, creepy in an 80's nostalgic kind of way. I couldn't finish it.

I really don't like workout videos. I'd so much rather run down the street, hike up a mountain, swim laps at the pool, toss coconuts, or do ANYTHING else (except get chased by dogs, obviously). But in a pinch, it gets my heart rate up and gives me a good sweat while Jr. naps in the next room.

So until I have full deciding power over the hours of my day again, I guess I'm just going to have keep movin' my buttweesimo in my room with my curtains drawn. Any recommendations?

P.S. I wouldn't mind working out with Homestar. He wouldn't make me do push-ups.